While the most profound grief often follows the death of a loved one or the end of a significant relationship, it can also arise from other forms of loss—leaving a beloved home, changing careers, or losing the ability to pursue a cherished activity. Regardless of the cause, the core principles of grief remain the same.
Deep loss can leave us feeling overwhelmed, exhausted, or disconnected from the world. In Western culture, there are few structured guidelines for mourning, and we often feel pressured to "move on" and resume our lives, even when we are not emotionally ready. This silent endurance can be harmful, especially when our world feels shattered. Grief is a journey that takes on many forms, evolving and transforming over time, often in unexpected ways.
Grief is also a deep journey of the soul. Many spiritual traditions view grief as an opportunity for growth and transformation, a process that reconnects us with the divine, with our deeper selves, and with the greater cycle of life and death. From this perspective, grief is seen not only as a reaction to loss but also as a means of purification, healing, and spiritual awakening.
In some traditions, grief is often regarded as a reflection of our soul’s longing and the deep connection we have to the people, experiences, and things we love.
Attachment. Buddhism teaches that attachment is a key cause of human suffering. Grief arises because we become attached to the people, places, and experiences in our lives. When we lose something we are deeply attached to, we experience pain. Grief enables us to acknowledge the impermanence of life and helps us loosen our attachment to material things. This can lead to greater freedom as we reflect on and come to terms with life’s transitory nature.
Our Soul’s Journey. Grief is an unavoidable aspect of our soul’s journey through life. Loss and grief are stepping stones, and opportunities towards our soul's grow, evolution and purpose. The soul may be called to experience deep sorrow in order to develop qualities like compassion, humility, and resilience. These experiences, while painful, are essential for spiritual growth and aligning with our soul’s true nature.
Grief the Master Teacher. Grief reminds us of our impermanence and mortality and encourages us to reflect on our values, our relationships, and what truly matters. The lesson of grief is to find meaning and purpose in the midst of pain and sorrow and to find your way back to the beauty and love that all life holds, even after profound loss. It teaches us to cherish the present moment and to live with greater awareness. It wakes us up to what is alive in us and in life.
Karma. Grief may be seen as part of a karmic lesson that we are meant to learn in our lifetime. Experiences of loss and suffering may be connected to past situations that we are now ready to symbolically and ritually let go of, to resolve old karmic patterns. Grief, therefore, can be understood as a necessary part of evolution, helping our soul purify itself and reach higher states of consciousness.
Grief has the potential to transform into something powerful: gratitude. Grief holds the potential to awaken us to the sacredness of life. One of grief’s most profound characteristics is its ability to remind us of the beauty and blessings we have experienced. It reminds us of the depth of love we have received and given. It is love's shadow.
The more we have loved, the more deeply we grieve when that love is lost. Grief opens us up to a deeper understanding of divine love, it can propel us to connect more fully with divinity, showing us that the love we have experienced with others is a reflection of the greater love that exists in all things.
When we hold onto grief for long periods, it can affect our physical health. Those who carry unresolved grief tend to breathe shallowly, depriving their bodies of oxygen. Grief reduces the flow of Qi, which can deplete the body and create an environment where toxins and illnesses thrive. The lungs, are particularly vulnerable to the effects of grief. Chronic grief can weaken the lungs, making them more susceptible to infections and diseases.
This connection between grief and the lungs highlights the importance of processing our emotions. If grief remains unresolved or unrecognised, it can linger for decades, shaping our lives in ways we may not truly understand. It can even become part of our identity, influencing our future.
Grief is commonly understood through a framework of the five stages:
These stages help to outline the emotional journey many people experience after a loss. However, grief is not a linear process, and individuals may move back and forth between these stages at different times.
Grief is associated with the Metal Element, which is connected to the season of Autumn. Just as Autumn represents the waning phase of life, the Metal Element reflects our ability to let go of the old and embrace the new. A healthy Metal Element allows us to process grief without becoming trapped by it, helping us open up to new possibilities with wisdom and acceptance.
However, if our Metal Element is weak, we may feel destabilised by grief, struggling to connect with others or to let go of our sadness. This can lead to a prolonged state of melancholy, weighing us down emotionally and physically. When we repress our grief or feel that it is not safe to express it, we may develop emotional armour that isolates us from the world, making it even harder to heal.
Transforming grief into gratitude happens naturally over time, there are ways to speed up this transformation:
Just as fallen leaves fertilise the soil for new growth in Spring, our experience of grief can create fertile ground for personal transformation. When sadness turns into gratitude, it opens the door to inspiration, helping us become more present and appreciative of the abundance in our life.
Qigong, can help facilitate the transformation of grief by opening up the energy channels in our body. This practice allows emotions such as sadness to move through us more quickly and in a healthy, natural way. Instead of feeling stuck in our grief, Qigong helps us process, experience and move our emotions with strength and grace, allowing us to flow through them.
By holding space for the feelings that arise during the grieving process, rather than pushing them aside, we enable the natural movement of Qi. This allows grief to transform into gratitude, helping us navigate this experience with greater courage, clarity, and connection.
Acknowledging and processing our grief enables us to reframe our experience of it in positive ways. Whether through mindfulness, Qigong, or simply allowing ourselves to feel it deeply, we can move through the pain of loss and emerge with a renewed sense of gratitude and inspiration for the future.
To Understand more about the lung energy function see the Conscious Breathing post.